Monday, May 22, 2006

3dpo: Progesterone Always Makes Me Sing The Blues

Seriously, how is this stuff supposed to work if most of it comes oozing out by mid-morning?

Also, I know the patient information says that some of the gel stays in the tube even after you've administered the full dose, but I'm still not entirely sure just how much I'm supposed to squeeze (bend, fold, crush) the bulb end before I've had "enough."

Nipple flames are subsiding, but general breast soreness is still there. As is the tremendous bloating...I'm glad my stash of "big girl clothes" is greater than just a couple of pairs of pants.



Late in the afternoon yesterday I began to feel, with utter certainty, that this cycle did not (or would not) work. I think it was a product of knowing I'm in an in-between phase: either fertilization has already occured, or it is no longer possible, but there is no chance of implantation yet. And in the deeper recesses of my heart, I am just so sure that in our attempt to reduce the risk of high-order-multiples, we triggered too early and ended up with only one egg that was already too old to be fertilized by the time the IUI sperm made it through the gates. I know I'm being irrational (as Ezra has been reminding me since I first mentioned this feeling to him), but I can't help having the feeling all the same.

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At 12:34 PM, May 22, 2006, Blogger electriclady said...

Glad the nipple flames are subsiding...and sorry you're feeling so pessimistic. It's that damn 2ww that allows for us to spend so much time second-guessing and torturing ourselves. If only it were like it is on TV, where you have an ambiguously defined "fertility procedure" and then find out if it worked the very! next! day!

 
At 3:03 PM, May 22, 2006, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Or even later that day! Man, I wish life were like TV sometimes...

I hope this is the only 2WW that you have to do, but I can totally understand your feelings of pessimism. I'm ovulating today, and already talking about IUI for our next cycle (or the one after). It's just so hard to keep hope alive when it lets you down each month.

 
At 4:07 PM, May 22, 2006, Blogger Lut C. said...

Now, I'm looking forward to the 2WW, just to get past the poking and prodding. I guess I should be careful what I wish for.

Just keep telling yourself that there are no reliable early PG symptoms.

Take care.

 
At 4:08 PM, May 22, 2006, Blogger persephone said...

Well, I don't know if it helps to remind yourself of this, but the reason you made that tradeoff was because the next batch might have matured pretty much all at once... I do hope you're pregnant. But if it's a choice between not pregnant at all, and pg with HOM? I think you already made that decision. All you can do at this point is not second-guess yourself.

 
At 4:34 PM, May 22, 2006, Blogger Keeping The Faith said...

You would think science could come up with a way to tell if fertilization right after ovulation occured or not. Then we'd know and could stop the insanity of the 2WW, not to mention stop the progesterone... waiting is the worst. Hang in there....

And I know how hard it is to have hope... you want to be positive but then you don't want to be knocked down (even harder) on your ass w/ the big let down.

 
At 6:28 PM, May 22, 2006, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I never understood how the shit worked if it oozed out either. And man, I hate shit that oozes.

 
At 8:47 PM, May 22, 2006, Anonymous Anonymous said...

My favorite part of the Crinone page:


94% of patients found Crinone® 8% easier to use than injectable progesterone.
84% of patients preferred Crinone® 8% over intramuscular injections of progesterone.


I am laughin hysterically at that for some reason; as if they really thought someone would prefer an inch and a half needle to the derriere?

I swear the 2ww can do such a mind job on you. I am all for the idea of the ambiguous "infertily procedure" that gives almost instaneous results - kind of like that obnoxious First Response commercial tries to claim. Wishing you luck!

 
At 8:53 PM, May 22, 2006, Blogger projgen said...

If it helps, most successful cyclers I know had that same feeling 3dpo. I was certain mine had *worked* 3dpo. Dunno why.

I know it feels like most of the stuff oozes out - such a pain. I really, really hope this is your only 2ww and you find a way to not go crazy. And then tell it to the rest of us!

Good luck, Robbie.

 
At 10:16 AM, May 23, 2006, Blogger x said...

I never understood how the 2ww could be the worst part of infertility treatments, but it is!

We never got any wedding details? How did it go?

Thinking of you!

 
At 3:24 AM, May 24, 2006, Blogger persephone said...

Despite being admonished to stop being so sensible, I'm back with more. :p I never used Crinone, but I'll assume the reason it doesn't matter if it oozes is the same as for suppositories. It's because that's not the progesterone oozing, it's just the stuff it's suspended in. The progesterone gets absorbed pretty much right away.

Lovely delivery system, I know. Have you ruined any of your favorite clothes yet?

 

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